Just tell me how to stop being anxious.
I want strategies to not be depressed.
I think I have a Dissociative Disorder.
Okayyyyy, I say. You’ve been watching videos of cute therapists pointing at writing in the air, haven’t you?
I have heard more of these kinds of declarations in my initial assessments lately. I call it the TikTok Effect.
Self-diagnosis and Self-Care have taken up a lot of space on social media. With the monetizing and App-etizing of therapy in a relatively short period of time, ‘psychotherapy’, once an experience mostly set in private offices, often out of reach for many, is now more accessible than ever.
But is there quality in what people are getting? Is there a genuine connection to someone you text every now and then who replies “How does that make you feel? Have you tried breathing deeply?”
Covid-19 sent us all into the Telehealth space and now many of us don’t feel a need to go back into the corporate offices (that charged us high rents) when we are fortunate enough to have an appropriate space at home to hold our sessions virtually. We have lost the intimacy of traditional therapy but gained accessibility to a wider range of people looking for support.
But is support all we offer? Grounding, mindfulness, breathing, and tapping — this is what therapy has been reduced to in 2022, at least according to TikTok, and many articles I read.
While incredibly helpful skills to incorporate into our lives, they are not going to save us from climate change or a nuclear war with Russia.
A severe mental health condition *which only a trained clinician can diagnose* will not be solved by counting to ten or looking around the room and naming the objects we see.
If you are in a relationship with a Narcissist, keeping a gratitude list isn’t going to stop you from being gaslit and abused.
SSRIs are proving to be limited in their effectiveness for many people, especially in the long-term.
We’ve been sitting on sofas trying to uncover our inner motivations and patterns for just over 100 years and yet here we are: suicidal, depressed, anxious, and unable to ‘fix’ any of those problems. If you have Diabetes, we have solved for that, we can manage it. Severe Depression — have you tried yoga?
So here comes TikTok: an open forum for influencers, life coaches, psychologists and everyone in between, all promising you that it’s as easy as 1, 2, 3.
I have no quick tips. The strategies I offer and worksheets I can give as homework are all contingent upon my patients actually doing the work; practicing, digging deep, expending more than 30 seconds on their mental wellness over an extended period of time.
There is a renewed hope in Psychedelic Therapies which show promise in treating some of the most resistant mental health disorders but even they seem to be the domain of Silicon Valley start-ups before they’ve even been FDA approved.
There is a lot to be anxious about. Depression will impact many of us for reasons that range from situational to genetic. Therapy will not solve inequality or poverty. However, talking to a trusted, objective professional has proven to be, to date, one of the best defenses in feeling less alone in this crazy world.
Until I can offer more than holding space for people whom I accept unconditionally, and can draw from my years of experience and training to understand, I will continue to show up for anyone who is willing to put in the effort. But you won’t find me on TikTok.
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